From Prema Kumari dasi – Russia, Saint Petersburg

Dear Srila Gurudev,
Please accept my humble obeisances at the dust of your lotus feet that can fulfill all desires. All glories to you! All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
On that most important day of the year let me express gratitude to you for everything that you give me day by day, for your care and love.
You are my internal spiritual master and well-wisher, my spiritual father. You do so much for all your followers, work so hard, go through many risks to save the fallen souls. And after so so long time in this material world you found me and safe me too.
brahmāṇḍa bhramite kona bhāgyavān jīva
guru-kṛṣṇa-prasāde pāya bhakti-latā-bīja
“According to their karma, all living entities are wandering throughout the entire universe. Some of them are being elevated to the upper planetary systems, and some are going down into the lower planetary systems. Out of many millions of wandering living entities, one who is very fortunate gets an opportunity to associate with a bona fide spiritual master by the grace of Krishna. By the mercy of both Krishna and the spiritual master, such a person receives the seed of the creeper of devotional service”. [Chaitanya Charitamrita, Madhya-lila,19.151].
Last year you gave me the initiation due to which prema-bhakti can be awakened in the heart by the process of devotional service, and this service is the Cintamani stone fulfilling all desires. Will I ever be able to thank you? You do so much for me, what can I do for you? I am your eternal debtor. But at the same time you answer this question by saying that we have to develop Krishna Consciousness and share It with others. All I can and must do is to become your real disciple, follow your instructions. Conscious and remembering all this, can I read japa inattentively? Can I not listen to your lectures and not follow your words? Of course, I’m still very far from your good disciple, my heart is filled with all kinds of unfavorable, shameful qualities, but still let it become the goal of my life.
During quarantine, I really feel your prayers, protection and that you watching over me. There is more time to chant japa nicely and study Srila Prabhupada’s books, especially the Bhagavad Gita. Please, bless me to study Bhakti Sastri.
Recently, you have had a difficult tumor removal operation. Dear Gurudev, take care. I always pray to Lord Nrsimhadeva for protection of your strength and health.Now as you said there is an opportunity to accumulate more strength to continue serving you in the preaching, because this is what you live. I am always delighted with how decisively and boldly you preach. You are a real shark in Krishna consciousness for me and an example of a real disciple of Srila Prabhupada. You are acharya. You are the perfect bhajanananda and perfect ghosthananandi with burning desire in the heart to bring a joy to Srila Prabhupada, who out of compassion wants Lord Chaitanya’s mercy to be received by the whole world. You are my Hero.
«The sankirtana movement can be spread by a person who is especially favored by Lord Krishna (kṛṣṇa-śakti vinā nahe tāra pravartana). Without first obtaining the mercy of the Lord, one cannot spread the holy name of the Lord. One who can spread the Lord’s name is called labdha-caitanya in the words of Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati. The labdha-caitanya is one who has actually awakened his original consciousness, Krsna consciousness. The influence of the pure devotees in Krsna consciousness is such that it can awaken others to become immediately Krsna conscious and engage themselves in the transcendental loving service of Krsna . In this way the descendants of pure devotees increase, and Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu takes much pleasure in seeing the increase of His devotees». [Chaitanya Charitamrita, Madhya-lila, 11.102].
Now, in the humble hope to bring you pleasure, especially during this period of self-isolation, I really cannot wait to offer you the true owner of all these fruits the modest results of my service for the year.
By your grace 285 books of Srila Prabhupada have been distributed. Unfortunately, during the Marathon I rarely went to sankirtana because of circumstances, but still 36 books were distributed. Of course, this is not enough, and I will try to increase the results by at least two times next year. During the quarantine, books are gradually distributed to couriers and taxists. Also I was trying to go to harinams. And surprisingly Krishna got me a job, where chef was Shiva devotee and my duties included cooking vegetarian food for the guys in the office. Tons of prasadam were shared! Doing these services I always remember your worlds that preaching is the privilege. Thank you.
Incredibly surprising was my recent trip to relatives in Siberia. It turned out that my dad and his wife are interested in Vedic culture and want to move closer to the festival, which is attended by Chaitanya Chandra Charan prabhu and many other preachers. Dad says that spiritual teacher is necessary in life because the spiritual path is very difficult. It is also surprising that my grandma (mother of my dad) knows about the Hare Krishna Maha Mantra for many years and without actual understanding of the meaning had been crooning it. She says that this mantra calms her. My grandma also read books of Srila Prabhupada who only speaks the truth as she claims. I gave her a book and a large leaflet with the mantra. We sang Hare Krishna together, even sang into the microphone at her work (she is a singer, and her group has been called “Amrita” for fifteen years!) The plans of the Lord are amazing! Dear spiritual master, please bless them so that they will accept the true spiritual master as soon as possible and back to Home, back to Krishna. All glories to you!
Also last year I graduated from high school with honors and entered the university. I hope that will also bring you joy.
Thank you for your care, for the online lectures. Thank you for all the lessons of humility that as you said help us serve better.
Dear Srila Gurudev, please, don’t reject me and engage in the service to you. The base of the jewelry with the multifaceted diamonds of your grace is that I’m your servant. And this is the only decoration — the reason of all the good in my life. Do I have any more hopes?
sri-guro paramananda premananda phala-prada
vrajananda-pradananda-sevayam mam niyojaya
“My dear spiritual master, who gives the fruit of the highest bliss — the bliss of love of Godhead — please engage me in the blissful service of Sri Krsna, who bestows bliss upon the land of Vraja.”
I am very sad that we spend this Vyasa Puja in separation. I miss you, Srila Gurudev, and miss servicing together with godsisters and godbrothers. When that day come true when we all will chant Hare Krishna and be together?
mac-cittā mad-gata-prāṇā
bodhayantaḥ parasparam
kathayantaś ca māṁ nityaṁ
tuṣyanti ca ramanti ca
“The thoughts of My pure devotees dwell in Me, their lives are fully devoted to My service, and they derive great satisfaction and bliss from always enlightening one another and conversing about Me.” [Bhagavad Gita, 10.9].
All glories to your Vyasa Puja! All glories to you! All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
In the hope to become your true disciple, servant of your servant, Prema Kumari dasi